They have turned the world blue,
I only realised this evening.
We should notice these things sooner.

My living room is lit with mini lights and I have already wrapped presents, which means they are under my tree much sooner this year than they ever have been. Everything has been pretty hectic recently. But although my invisible timetable has been rammed full with meetings here, there, classes wherever, and work, work, work, it has all felt a little empty.

I know why. And I’m not going to divulge in any details here because nobody reads it anyway and even you are reading it now and I am wrong, I still don’t want to besiege you with the ins and outs of my personal issues. All I will say is that I have once again lost somebody, and I am still unsure as to why this is, and why they have given no explanation.

It isn’t a nice thing to know that what is said to you is not any form of tangible truth, but is instead a hazy kind of fantasy developed to keep you happy and poke that fuzzy thing inside that blinkers you from realising….reality.

Ok. I am sounding completely morbid here, and it is the season of joy and goodwill - both of which I actually have an abundance of, despite my emotional niggles elsewhere. SO! I’ll start again.

The past few weekends have been spent both in London and York. Me and Scott made our way to London to watch Jools Holland and his Rhythm and Blues Orchestra Band - courtesy of BCX or some other 3-lettered, big business thingymabob - and, though we had to endure a 2 course meal with a  bunch of over dressed, over-made up, pretentious yuppies, we had an amazing time watching Little Jools and his Big Big Band in the Royal Albert Hall. We then skipped dessert with the aforementioned yups, and went to Tescos for Krispy Cremes and Kettle Chips instead. We also spent an afternoon with his brother, happily traipsing the backstreets of London in the rain before waiting to be let into Selfridges and buying my mum her amazing Christmas Present - A Jelly belly bean machine. Oh yes.

York was York. A city dear in my heart. It’s a shame we didn’t get tos pend longer there. I didn’t see all of the Christmas light

I have two assignments due next week, both of which don’t exist yet. One, however, was part-presentation and that part is over with now. Who’d have thought looking up from your script would reveal a small audience of blurry colours, faceless, indistinguishable, hiding behind my self-induced panic and tunnel vision!!!

I need to pick a topic to study for my Science Fiction module….

and…

I’ve completed my first ever film script. It is for a short, university production that should be about twenty minutes in length. And it was hell. But hell in a  good way. You know what way I mean. When you stare at a blank word document for an hour wondering what on earth you were thinking of accepting such an offer, thinking how the hell am I supposed to create something that is almost entirely conversation, when you are only used to writing blurbs, snippets, poetry, short prose…

what on earth was I doing?

I did it anyway. And by doing so, you could say, I expanded my horizons. I have also gained a new friend who has enlightened me on such issues as The Spirit Molecule, Time Travel, Serj Tankian and other  delights, who also listens to me ramble on and on (and on) about anything and everything, from my dream alter-ego super-hero self, my thoughts on religion, and even how I came to own the couch in my house. Which, as you can imagine, is pretty good for me, seeing as most people switch off and nod along, glaze-eyed, when I talk complete nonsense. maybe he is just a really good actor. But I hope not.

Anyway, Scott is now playing with his Bose Companion 3, one of his Christmas presents from me that I have had to give early because we bought it together yesterday whilst in York. I don’t think he could have sat out the next 3 weeks, watching it eagerly in its box whilst drooling over the mere thought of the sounds he could hear from it if he set it all up. Plus, I want him to play a bit of Nick drake on it for me, and I can’t wait until the 25th either so….

Ciao!

Wait, he’s playing Simon and Garfunkel now….I’ll wait for this to finish….